Hanky Panky Thongs

17 Jan

I have a thing about underwear. I’m not talking about sone kind of kink, so get your head out of the gutter. I’m just really obsessive about visible panty lines. I love underwear, but I hate looking like I’m wearing underwear, if that makes any sense. (This is why I love Spanx bras.) For years I searched for the perfect pair of skivvies, and it seemed like I was constantly buying  pair after pair. It was a well known obsession of mine, to the point where I’d say, “I need to get some new underthings,” and my friends and loved ones would respond, “You can’t possibly.”

Cut to a few years ago. I was again fed up with my underpinnings situation, and I didn’t know what to do. I had read about Hanky Panky thongs in a multitude of magazines, but, to be frank, I was not interested in having a perma-wedgie. Avoiding underwear-in-the-butt syndrome was the reason I was constantly searching for new chonies! I don’t even remember what compelled me to try out a pair of Hanky Pankys, but I did, and my life was forever changed. I truly felt – and looked – like I had no underwear at all. My dream had finally come true!

It doesn't hurt that Hanky Panky thongs come in tons of great prints and colors


Hanky Panky thongs come in three styles; Original rise, low rise, and mid rise. In my opinion the original rise should be called high rise. We’re talking HIGH rise. Like Urkel high rise. My first pair of Hanky Pankys was an original rise (I’m a somewhat curvy lady, and thought low-rise wouldn’t fit by badonk) and they felt like they were up around my armpits. So I switched to low rise, and was wearing those every day until HP came out with the mid rise. Mid rise are perfect for me, and I’m slowly phasing out my low rise pairs for mid rise. I say phasing out because I can’t afford to overhaul my underwear drawer. At $18-$21 a pair, Hanky Panky thongs are a little on the steep side. I usually stock up at the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, when they’re only $13. Still, some of you may be scoffing at the fact that I buy even $13 underwear. Look, I’m not exaggerating when I say I hunted for YEARS to find underwear I like. YEARS. To me, $13, or even $21, is totally worth it for underwear that doesn’t ruin the look of my outfit, and is comfy to boot.

Yes, I did just say comfy. Sure, they’re little and lacy and thong-y, but Hanky Panky thongs are the most comfortable underwear I have ever worn. You will feel like you aren’t wearing underwear, Plus, since you won’t have any panty lines, you’ll look like you’re not wearing underwear! (You may be thinking, “So why even wear underwear?” Are you nuts? Underwear is a hug for your nethers! Why NOT wear underwear?!) People will look at your ass because your pants are cute or your butt is nice, not because you have a huge V indentation across your trunk junk from your ill-fitting underpants. Their VPL banishing properties are what first put Hanky Panky thongs in the spotlight. They don’t have side seams, so there’s no pinching on your hips, and they’re made out of this amazing stretchy lace that conforms to your body (HPs come in only one size) without tugging or squeezing. Plus, my new favorite – the mid rise – is made of modal, AKA the greatest fabric ever created. Accept no imitations – Hanky Panky is the true, original, holy grail of underwear.

Hanky Panky Thong: $18 to $21


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